My Femdom Relationship

For Christmas Jack managed to buy me a beautiful set of diamond ear rings. Jack is a good provider and a very sweet man. The fact that he is submissive makes him a better, more loving husband. A loving, submissive man is truly a gift from God. No matter what happens they tend to put the needs of their spouse above their own. Don't ask me how Jack had enough money to buy the ear rings, I don't know and don't care. I love wearing them.

I want Jack to think of me as the women who owns him, and I want him to have a real and honest respect for my authority over him.

If you have read earlier posting, you know that the first visit with Jack's dominatrix was an eye opening experience. I felt like Dorothy in the Wizard. Well, I thought to myself, Caroline you're not in Kansas anymore. A few days later the phone rang. It was Kimberly. Without hesitation she asked would I like to spend Saturday with her?

With my daughter's visit; I have a lot of thoughts. We had a very nice visit with her and our future son in law this weekend. A few minutes ago they finished packing up the car and left for Atlanta.

The first year of our 'fem/dom' marriage was by far the most difficult. On some level Jack wanted to submit, he wanted me to be in charge, but it was a roller coaster of emotions.

Although I kept Jack out of the house for several weeks, we talked on the phone every couple of days. Jack would call to say hello, to see how things were going, and to see if I needed anything. I told him that I had spent time with Kimberly. He was obviously nervous with the thought of me visiting his former dominatrix. He also understood that if he ever wanted to return home, it was best that he never talk to this women again.

For a 'fem/dom' relationship to work there needs to be a very serious commitment between the husband and the wife. Without this type of commitment the relationship turns into a game or simple role playing. For many couples there is nothing wrong with this. However, for those couples that truly desire to live the 'fem/dom' lifestyle, a sense commitment is extremely important.

One of my favorite blogs is 'whatever she says'. In the profile, the writer states that in his opinion most marriages are female led. I agree with this statement. He goes on to say, however, that the difference in his marriage, or a true WLM, is that the guy has acknowledged the wife's authority, and she has formally accepted her role as head of the house.

In the last presidential elections, Jack and I went to vote. On the way out I asked Jack who he voted for. He answered "the way you instructed me to vote, mistress." That earned him a "good boy".

I learned early on that humiliation can be an effective way to keep the male ego under control. It is amazing the power that simple things, like women's underwear has on a man. It is both the act of buying the underwear, and wearing it.

When I discovered that Jack had been paying money to see a dominatrix, it was like my whole world came crashing down. At that moment I didn't want anything to do with him. Aside from the simple idea that he was paying money for sexual services of some kind, it was money that we needed for our family.

Thank all of you who were kind enough to make comments and ask questions. While the questions pertain to different things, there is one question that repeatably comes to me. If I had not found the panties in the gym bag, or if Jack did not have a relationship with a dominatrix, but simply told me of his need for submission, would I have become his mistress.

It is my opinion that women want good things for their men. In this regard a 'fem/dom' marriage is no different than any other. Yes, Jack is a slave, but he is happy and most content as a slave husband. Over the years I have learned when to pull the leash tight, and when to give him more running room. It is a balance, and I am not always right. It is never easy to understand a man. Often times they don't understand them selves. It is natural that men look to their wives for direction and guidance in life.

As I walked out of the coffee shop, I knew it was time to let Jack come home. If you have been reading the blog, you know that we had a difficult, but very frank conversation. While most of the feelings of anger had passed, I still felt a very real sense of hurt and betrayal. At lest by now I did know enough about dominance, submission, and things in between that I could have an intelligent conversation with Jack.

As I walked up to the cafe door where Jack was standing, I noticed his eyes glancing down to my legs. It had been years since I wore a skirt as short as this. It was not what you would call a 'whore' skirt, but it was short. Complimented with the boots, the outfit did get Jack's attention. That is exactly what I wanted it to do.

There are some conversations that you will remember all of your life. There are some events that I will never forget. Finding the panties in Jack's gym bag five years ago was one of those events that will stay with me forever.

It was one of those days I will always remember. It was the last time I walked out of the door of Kimberly's studio. It was a hot, rainy day. Kimberly had one of her submissive males take an umbrella, and walk with me to the car. He had been trained by Kimberly on how to hold an umbrella for a lady; walk just a small half step behind making sure she was always covered. He knew to open the car door, do a curtsy, and not say a word unless spoken to. Kimberly knew how to train men!

 To have an understanding of the couple that Jack and I have evolved into, it is important to understand the impression this unique young woman Kimberly had on me. Some people reading this blog may wonder if Kimberly and I eventually became friends. The answer is no. We are different types of people.

To all of you who have visited my blog, thank you very much. A special 'thank you' to those who were kind enough to leave a comment. It is nice to have positive comments. Since most of the people who follow blogs are men, I doubted that my little blog would get much attention. My writing style is so different than what men appear to like. Also, in this blog, the discussion will focus on relationships and feelings. These are topics which men normally like to stay away from.

It was one of those special days. It was like my wedding day, one of those days I will remember for ever. Jack followed me home from the coffee shop. He was nervous, so was I. We both understood that from that point on our relationship would be very different than it had been in the past. I had doubts. Could I really be the mistress/wife, could I be the dominatrix that my husband needed. In general, I knew what had to be done, but doing it was something else. As we walked into the house I took a deep breath.