Another FemDom Mistress: Introducing Sarah (And How Their FemDom Relationship Works)

As most of you know I have few girl friends who to some degree dominate their husbands. They read the blog, and from time to time will give me ideas on what to write about. One of these good friends is Sarah. She has given permission for me to write about her and the relationship she has with her husband. This will be in a very general way so that no one will be able to figure out who she is. Actually, if you knew her and her husband on a casual level, you would never, ever guess that she is the absolute boss in their marriage.

While I love Sarah to death, we are very different people. 

She is liberal and votes democratic. I am conservative, and tend to vote republican. What we have in common is that our guys vote the way we tell them. Sarah, as liberal as she is would prefer that men not even have the right to vote. In her view it would help make up for all the damage caused by men ruling the world for so many years. I may not agree with her on that, but if a submissive man is going to vote, my feeling is that he should vote the way mistress dictates to him. The logic is simple. A man should always trust in his wife's judgment, and what better way to do that is to vote for the candidate that she chooses.

Sarah's husband is a physician, a general practitioner. He is a very sweet man, and a very smart man. They were introduced when he was in medical school. She was a young nurse. If was anything but love at first sight. They had a heated argument over something or other. Both of them walked away from the chance encounter using four letter words to describe the other person. In those days Sarah had a temper, and so did her future husband. Her husband is what I call an alpha submissive. At work he can be very dominate. He can be very aggressive with other men, but when with Sarah is very humble and submissive.

As Sarah tells me they some how made it through the first encounter, started dating, and eventually were married. 

In the early part of their marriage they played dominance/submission games in the bed room. It was nothing serious, just some light bondage, toy handcuffs, and a little whip that couldn't hurt a thing. Sarah did notice that her guy always wanted to be on the receiving end of the punishment. She tells me that the games often ended with him at her her feet. He loved to suck on her toes, and kiss her feet. It was just a game, and there was nothing that bothered her. As time went on they had children, and there was less opportunity for these games. She didn't think too much of it.

About seven years ago, and after several years of marriage, Sarah's husband said to her something like "remember those games we used to play, where you would boss me around?'. She said 'yes' and they then revived old memories. He told her that he still thought about those games, and then asked if she would be willing to take more responsibility for their marriage. She was confused, and asked him what he meant. He then said I would like you to boss me around for real. He then said not a game, but take charge of me and our marriage in real life. This discussion carried on for a few weeks. He brought home some books about female domination and some articles. It didn't really come together for her. Finally her husband came up with the idea of visiting a dominatrix. As I said Sarah was always liberal and a democrat as well.

Sarah and her husband went as a couple to visit Kimberly. 

She told me it was an eye opening experience. While she didn't understand the 'why' of it, Kimberly spent a lot of time talking about the need of men to be dominated by a women. They went to several sessions, and Kimberly taught her how to dominate a guy on a physical level. However, Kimberly also explained that to really dominate a man you needs to understand him on an emotional level. You need to understand his inner needs as only a wife can do. By the time they finished their fifth session, Sarah was hooked. By that time she believed that it was a wife's duty to dominate her husband if she had the least idea that he might be submissive. She also came away with the idea that most men were submissive to a certain degree.

One of the things that both Sarah and I agree on is that it is often difficult for men to live the submissive lifestyle. Like me, she considers her guy to be a 'slave husband'. She snaps her fingers, and he drops to the ground with his head, elbows, and toes touching the floor. He is trained to do this any time, any place she snaps her fingers. It is instant discipline, and humiliation depending on who may be around. In the privacy of their home she drills him everyday on this procedure. It has become second nature for him to drop any time she snaps her fingers. At home I drill Jack in the same way. It is good for a man to know that his wife can bring him to his knees, anytime, anyplace, with simple snap of her fingers.

Like Jack Sarah's husband is trained and expected to 'perform' instantly anytime her fingers are snapped. 

There is to be no looking around to see who may be watching. If she observes him looking, before drooping to the floor, it is grounds for punishment. This little ritual gives a women enormous power over a man. He never knows when his wife will put him in place. He knows to be a 'good boy' at all times, especially when in public. It makes a man very conscious of the authority his wife has over him.

It is Sarah's opinion that most men, on their own, are not strong enough to live the life of a slave husband. This is why a submissive man needs a strong wife to take charge of both him and the marriage. According to Sarah this is where punishment and discipline are important to the male. The wife sets the standards. It the guy fails to live up to the standards, or doesn't do what he is supposed to do, he knows there will be punishment. Sarah, unlike myself, will use a heavy leather belt on her guy. He carries the marks on his rear end to show that he has not always been a good boy.

On one of our first visits to her home, Sarah had her husband show me the belt she uses as well as the marks on his rear end. By that time, I had my experience with Kimberly, and was somewhat accustomed to seeing men without their clothes on. It still felt a little strange to be in a private home, with a man walking around in panties and a yellow ribbon in his hair. She liked to tease him by saying 'what if your nurses could see you this way, and laugh at him.' In private she told me that he loves the feeling of humiliation. He especially likes it when I humiliate him in front of another women.

That day in Sarah's home was the beginning of our friendship. 

It meant a lot to me that she was willing to show off her husband to me. She was not a dominatrix doing this for the money. She was simply a wife who loved her husband. She got into the dominate wife thing by doing what her man needed to be happy. Like Jack and I their relationship evolved to where her husband, when not at work, lived as a slave. What I did observe that day, was a certain degree of contentment in her husband. He was embarrassed to be shown off in front of me, but it was not the first time Sarah had shown him off to another women. Once he got over the initial humiliation of having a women see him in panties, it was obvious that he enjoyed serving. He prepared a light lunch, and served it with a white wine. Sarah kept a small bell on the table and rang it when we needed something. He would come into the room with a little smile on his face, and do a polite curtsy.

As FemDom mistress, I have received countless emails of people asking me how to begin a successful and long-lasting FemDom relationship. This blog here is an attempt to recount some old stories, but if you want to take your FemDom relationship seriously I recommend that you check out my book, The FemDom Relationship Guide: How Submissive Men and Strong Women Can Have Successful Long-Term Relationships. You can check it out on Amazon or read the post introducing my book, where I describe how I started my FemDom relationship and how it developed.

This book contains all my wisdom  and experiences of > 10 years in a FemDom relationship combined.  I wish I would have had it when my husband suggest we begin FemDom...